And yesterday still knocks me down.

Thread bare tendons snapping back and forth like a can to can phone line in a tug of war.
I’m trying to get through to you by tip toeing on this unsteady connection.
Put away your shuffling dancing feet so I can talk to you for a moment.
Why must you insist on existing past me;
Rain dancing to the drums of a forgotten chest beat.
Heart beating so fast and full that it nearly shattered my rib cage.
Your dance brought my tears and my tears brought the flood.
Yesterday’s wounds weren’t properly scabbed over though I’m on the mend.
You still look at the words “I love you”, distrustfully, holding them in your hands awkwardly like they would poison you if they broke or as if to ask “What am I to do with this?”.
If I had to write a manual to accompany them, it would read “Love me back”…
Learn to advance your sense of worry, anxiety is only rational because she’ll say goodbye soon.

How Heavy are your thoughts

How much do your thoughts weigh?
Do they have your head hanging chin to chest
or do they have you walking on clouds like your brains made of hot helium
Do they sink you when you swim
Or can we use your head as a flotation device
Does your neck strain to keep your head up
or are they so light that they can’t help but pull your lips up with them

Regrets are useless paper weights, keeping you from rising
When you look outside your dark black stain glass tinted eyes, you start to see
You spent so much time looking down that you thought the world was made out of shoes, feet and ground
Let go off your thoughts and watch them float off
Listen to the shouts turn into whispers
Let the negativity whimper
They say you have a stick up your ass, but you’re just thinking feather-light
When I ask you how heavy your thoughts are, you respond “Not heavy at all”

Precious

Hold me pensively, like a secret between God and soul.

Practice me daily like a language that only you and nature know.

Keep me close like a childhood scar that you have accepted and now cherish.

Never let me go like the memory of each first time.

Clench me tight like hope in a protesters fist.

Clutch me in your grip like arthritis taking hold of an old man’s tired joints.

Transfix me in your forever like we both have the naivety to believe in an eternity.

Fasten me to your mind like a prayer or an affirmation.

You and I know.

Yes, Because you and I know that you’re the only one who knows the words to my song and who’s willing to sing every precious lyric.          

Trail Weary

You’re still travelling through the travails of my brain flaps,

trying to craft new footprints to my heart.

You have your love mapped out perfectly,

looking for marks and X’s that will reveal a dream.

I told you not to waste trust on me and no tears will revive a drought.

You’re following an empty trail through my mind – Its a cardboard shanty town,

its inhabitants live in voice boxes,

thoughts waiting to become words,

waiting to be communicated.

Loose Threads

Oh captive, my captive

I’m trying to seem more authentic and less deceptive

You want me to be 100 percent more perceptive

and 50% less protective,

You want freedom and less connection

While we stare at each other from our respective planets,

like we are trying to telepathically feel each others presence

Like a mirror collecting its own pieces to display a severed reflection.